Last Wishes

I was watching a video journal entry that a musician made the other day.  He answered select questions made by fans.  I remember one question that I found particularly interesting.  It was the topic of the "bucket list".  I had never heard of this concept before, or ever for that matter.  I was wondering to myself, "How do you actually make a concise list of things that you want to do before you die?"  Are these lists only of things that you haven't done and you would like to accomplish or can they be events that you wish to repeat once more because you loved them so much?  I figure that this is something that could be a combination of both.  I would also think that my bucket list should include things that I specifically want to avoid, although that may be left in more of a will perspective.  The Bucket List, as I have come to understand it this afternoon, was popularized by a movie made in 2007 starring Jack Nicholson and Morgan Freeman.  Both characters are dying and choose to fulfill as many of their dreams as possible before their lives end.  I always find it interesting how pop culture finds a way to a simple "list of things to do before you die" and make it a pop culture reference with one film.

There are many different ways to spread your wishes in this life.  You can even put your wishes on a banyan tree in Hong Kong.  It's true!  The Lam Tsuen wishing trees are shrines in which people put their paper wishes on the tree by throwing them up with an orange.  I guess that's one way to pin your hopes on something.  I have never been one of those people who wished for the world before I kick the bucket or so to speak.  I know that we can't have everything in life.  We all have dreams that we hold on to, and I definitely have those.  For instance, I want to grow old on the Jersey Shore.  Some people want to leave the place where they were born and get as far away as they can, but I really don't.  If I wanted to live anywhere else, it would be Scotland.  I would want that, because I know that would be my husband's dream.  I would always want to be near the water.  My other dream would be to write for a living, and just to have my own column in a magazine or newspaper.  These are real life dreams that, for all intents and purposes, could come true, but I wouldn't sit on my ass and wait for it to happen.  In the meantime, I do other things that get me ahead.  I go to school to try and get a career, and I do what I can to get by.  If I grow old with my husband and I live out the rest of my life with him, that is really all the bucket list I need.  Even if all the other stuff doesn't pan out, my life will be perfect. 

I think we go through life with distinct fear that we have accomplished nothing.  We try and try to do as much as we possibly can and sometimes we run like a rat on a wheel.  Maybe we forget to take time to smell the roses and enjoy what life has to offer, and realize what we enjoy.  Some people have this harsh one track mind that keeps them from enjoying the diversity of life.  If we did that, maybe we wouldn't have a huge bucket list, or maybe our bucket list would have more interesting wishes.  I could never live a humdrum existence of doing something that I absolutely hated, but sometimes many people have to.  Really the only thing you can do is make the best of it by filling in the gaps with the stuff you love.  Capture as many of the little things as you can, when you can.  You never know when that chance may be fleeting.  I guess I started to feel this way after my Mom passed away recently.  She seemed to do as much as she could have done in her life, but I wonder if there were some things that she wished for and never got the chance to fulfill.  In a way that saddens me.  For my whole life, I have lived for the moment.  I used to think that was irresponsible of me, but I really don't anymore.  My favorite quote from Steel Magnolias aptly says how I feel about life.  "I'd rather have thirty minutes of wonderful than a lifetime of nothing special." ~Shelby Latcherie