Mom

My Mom was a person who touched so many lives throughout years. She was such a vibrant, loving, and caring personality who would offer you the shirt off of her back if you needed it. She was the one who brought me into this world and educated me on how to be the best human being that I possibly can. Even as I write this now, I can't hold back the tears. She was not only the matriarch in our family, but the foundation for all of us. Mom was the one who helped me when I'd fall and picked me back up so that I could try again. She always taught my sisters and me to be compassionate, loving, and understanding. Sometimes I falter when it comes to those qualities, but I try and use them to the best of my ability. I've learned everything from tying my shoes to decorating a holiday tree from my mother. She gave us the sense of tradition and we are lucky enough to carry that with us.

When I was younger, she was a stay-at-home mother. She was there when we left for school and there when we came home. She bandaged our knees when we fell and dried our tears when we cried. She made snicker-doodles and brownies with us in the Winter and holiday months. During the Summer months, she always made sure that we had activities to keep us busy. I can remember when my birthday would come, she would take me to Island Beach State Park. We would make numerous trips to the shore. She taught me how to appreciate nature, and my love for the ocean comes from her inspiration. Mom took us to Allaire State Park and we rode the Pine Creek Railroad train many times over the Summer. She would take us to the nature center and toured the historic buildings with us. She even taught us how to taste a honeysuckle, which may seem trivial. She would share vegetables that were grown in her garden, and taught us how to cook from a very young age. I can remember making spaghetti with her in the kitchen. Mom was a wonderful cook, but she was a slave to convenience once she began working. We used to giggle at her meal in the bag dinners, which weren't perfected and they were definitely well before their time.

Faith alone was a big part of her life, which she always brought to her family. My mother shared her spirituality with us, and provided us with the faith in a higher power. Though I dispute religion as a realist, I'm glad that she loved us enough to share something that was so deeply important to her. She would always make trips to her Spiritualist retreats in Pennsylvania. When we were children, she began taking us with her on these trips. Years later, she still made the trips to her Spiritual retreat, but they were in Roanoke, Virginia. When she would go on the trips to Virginia, her and my father went to stay in the Blue Ridge Mountains. They loved bringing their dogs, Natasha and Tanya, with them for their vacation. My mother made lifelong friends through her faith and she made sure to visit the retreat at least once a year.

My Mother sacrificed being an at home parent, in our teens, to work for the benefit of the family. She worked for twenty-four years as a bus driver for Monmouth Academy and for years she worked as a florist by trade. She was a such a creative person and being a florist was the perfect medium for her. Mom had an excellent work ethic, but she never forgot to dote on us. When my older sister Stacey came into our lives in 1984, my mother fostered a wonderful relationship with her. I am so very lucky to have Stacey in my life, and I am so grateful to my mother for giving us that chance. Mom was overjoyed to have her back, and she always felt a debt of gratitude to Stacey's adopted parents for raising such a wonderful daughter. My mother's sense of family was something she instilled in all of us, and that is a gift. My mother always made our family gatherings special, even when she wasn't up to hosting them herself. When the holidays would come around, friends and family sat at our table. Mom always made everyone feel as if they were all family. Everyone who walked through her front door, whether they were family or friends, was treated with kindness. The men in my life and my sisters' lives were always treated like members of the family. She treated my husband Donald like a son, and the same went for my siblings' significant others.

My mother was always there for me when my health problems sprung up. She took me to doctors and tried to find a way to make my life as normal as possible. Even when I was the hospital with my disorder, my Mom would never leave my side. Today I value my life, because she was in it. She took care of me when I had my seizures and made every attempt to keep me from feeling like there wasn't hope. She did this even when she was experiencing health problems herself. Mom wasn't the type of person who would want you to worry about her, but she was always worried about everyone else. I had no idea that she was feeling that ill the day before, and you would never really know it just by looking at her. I think that was her way of making sure that we didn't make a fuss, although I wish she had given us a chance to prevent this. I think that the way she went is how she'd hoped it would end. She didn't want everyone to stare at her body; she wanted to be cremated and for us to celebrate her life. This was something that she always told us, even in our teenage years.

Even as adults, we think that our parents will always be there for us. This is something that we think even if it's just on a subconscious level. It's almost like a human instinct that we take longevity for granted. I look at the way my Dad is handling this, and it takes everything I have to keep strong just for him. The same goes for my sisters. This is one of the hardest events that we've ever gone through, in our entire lives, as a family. I am really grateful that we all have each other and all of the memories that will lay in our hearts forever. My mother was a very spiritual person and I know that she would always want us to know that she is in a better place. I'm not entirely sure if that better place exists, but the hope will always remain in my heart. My mother was a benevolent and loving human being. Our family was so very fortunate and grateful to have her in our lives. She gave me life, she gave me hope, and unconditional love. There will never be a day that I won't miss her.