When Do We Find Happiness?

How do you know when it's time to be happy?  You can go through the rigors that the day puts forth, with all it's bumps and obstacles, and get completely caught up and consumed.  You forget to make some time for yourself.  I think the reason that we put limitations or prerequisites on that emotion.  It becomes something that we put on a calendar or on a memo in your BlackBerry.  It seems that we have so many worries, that we have no time for those thoughts.  We even forget what it feels like to smile.  Some psychiatrist's say that we become victims of negative self-talk that keeps us from finding joy.  For long stretches, it happens to me.  This Summer was the longest stretch I've gone without feeling truly happy.  Only recently has that started to filter back, but it's been gradual.  They say that joy shouldn't be left to those with perfect lives or fluid time schedules. 

I think that it's terribly hard to find happiness when you are going through horrible struggles, but I'm still learning how to find the joy in the transitory.  I'm beginning to think that seperating yourself from things and indulging in something simple, but good realy really helps.  When I was dealing with my Mom's death, and my family was making me crazy, I stayed home one night, read one of my favorite books, and I had a cold glass of iced tea.  After that I slept for the first time in days!  I felt renewed!  For that evening, I was alone and happy.  For that evening, I was able to nurture a happy feeling that comforted me more at my worst.  It was still tough for me afterward, but that method of finding a simple pleasure is helpful.

Happiness doesn't come naturally for everyone.  For some people, fallen expectations are usually met by sadness, discouragement, etc.  I've read, in many self help books, that you can choose to be happy.  I'm guessing that you can create happiness, by doing something that makes you happy.  Even if something bad happens, just take some time for yourself.  Remember that the sun comes up the next day, even if it's behind the clouds.  I know that sounds stupid, but it gives me hope.  Buddhists say that you have to find peace with losing everything, because eventually it happens to us all.  We have to enjoy what we have, but realize the impermanence.  If we keep that in mind, things really don't hurt so bad and happiness can be found.  I don't know how much of that it is true, but it sounds like something to keep in mind.